In my articles on BiblicalSexology.com entitled “Why Did God Make Sex?” and “What Should We Want From Sex?”, I showed that God created woman and by extension sex for man. In another article on BiblicalSexology.com entitled “Sexual Fantasy & Masturbation”, I proved from the Scriptures that men enjoying sexual fantasies about women and masturbating to these fantasies is not sin. Fantasies of sex itself are not sinful before God, but only fantasies involving enticement to extra-marital sexual relations are sinful.
In my article “Debunking 10 Common Christian Arguments Against Porn” here on PornToTheGloryOfGod.com, I showed 10 of the most common arguments Christians try to make against men enjoying erotic imagery and why these arguments are faulty. I then went on to make a positive case for the use of porn by Christian men in my article “How does watching porn and masturbating glorify God?” here on PornToTheGloryOfGod.com.
If you have not already read the articles mentioned above from both BiblicalSexology.com and this blog as well, please review those articles before continuing here.
If you have read and fully absorbed the Scriptures and applications of those Scriptures I presented and have come to a full acceptance of the fact that viewing porn/erotic images and masturbating to those images is not sinful, but in fact glorifying to God, there are still some unanswered questions as to the production of erotic imagery.
If you have read and absorbed the truths in those articles then I would like you to read the following story.
The Community Art Gallery
There once was a town with a master artist, a painter, living in it. The young men of the town would save for years to buy one his works of art. Each painting was a masterpiece and unique in its own special way. On a certain day each year, the men of the town would host an art exhibition with each man putting on full display the beautiful painting they had saved years to purchase. And the master artist himself would come and enjoy the pleasure the men were taking in the admiring the beauty of his works.
There was one rule for this annual art show and that rule was “you can look, but you cannot touch”. And if any many came anywhere close to touching another’s mans painting, he would automatically be ejected from the art exhibition.
One year, one of the young men of the town finally had saved enough money to purchase his own painting from the town’s master painter. For years, like other men of the town, he had enjoyed viewing the paintings of the other men of the town in the annual art exhibition and finally he was going to get his own work of art. He went to the painter’s home and purchased his latest work of art. He then hung the beautiful painting in his bedroom and he kept the door shut and would never allow anyone to see it.
When the time came for the town’s annual art exhibition, the men of the town were excited to see the newest painting that the town’s master artist had produced. As was his habit each year, the young man came to the art exhibition to see the paintings of the other men. But he did not bring his painting with him. He left it at home.
The men of the town were greatly disappointed. And so too was the town’s master artist who had created the painting. The master artist said to the young man “Why have you left the work that I created for you back in your home? Why would you hide my beautiful work from the world? The beauty of my works is meant be seen by all. Not hidden in a room where only one person will ever see them.” The young men said, “The work of art you made for me was so beautiful that I thought other men here would try to touch it or steal it from me if I brought it out”. To which the master artist responded, “You must protect what I have given you, but protecting it does not mean hiding it away. You can shew forth my marvellous works so that others may take pleasure in the beauty of such works and at the same time protect what is yours and yours alone from harm.”
In the King James version of Song of Solomon 7:1 the Bible says of a woman’s body that it is “the work of the hands of a cunning workman”. And in the NASB version of Song of Solomon 7:1 it says a woman’s body is “The work of the hands of an artist”.
The Bible literally calls a woman’s body a work of art by the greatest artist of all – God. Why do we have art museums and art fairs? Why when we buy a beautiful painting, do we put in our living room for all visitors of our home to see? Because art is meant to be shown, not hidden and horded.
The Bible says in Psalm 9:1 “I will praise thee, O Lord, with my whole heart; I will shew forth all thy marvellous works”. Not doubt woman is one of God’s most “marvellous works” of art and the beauty of women, the beauty of all of God’s other marvelous works, was meant to be shown, not hidden.
In Psalm 111:2 the Bible states “The works of the Lord are great, sought out of all them that have pleasure therein”. There is nothing wrong in men taking pleasure in viewing the great works of the Lord, in the form of beautiful women, he has created.
Over the centuries many men, including Christians, Muslims and Jews have felt they must cover their women completely from head to toe for fear that other men would see the beauty of their women and seek to take it. But such actions over the centuries, such hording of beauty, has been a travesty.
When husbands seek to hide the beauty of their wives, they reveal their own insecurities and the fact that they do not believe they can both show her beauty and at the same time protect her body from those who would wish to take that which does not belong to them. But this is a false dichotomy. A man can do both.
God has reserved sexual relations between a man a woman for marriage as Hebrews 13:4 clearly states. In that passage God says he only honors and considers pure sexual relations which occur in the context of marriage. All sexual relations outside of marriage are acts of fornication.
But here is a truth that every Christian husband must take to heart.
While Hebrews 13:4 makes it clear that only you may engage in sexual relations with your wife, God never ever says you are the only man who may enjoy the sight of God’s artistry in the form of your wife’s beauty.
So, are you that husband who hides and hordes work of art, his wife, that God gave to him? Or do you gladly display the artistry that is your wife’s body while at the same time protecting her from harm? I pray that if you are the former, you will change your ways and seek to be the latter.
Pushing Your Wife to The Greatest Level of Submission
It is one thing if you have a wife whom you have been unsuccessful in grooming. An un-submissive and feminist wife would never cooperate with you as a husband in seeking to do the things we are talking about here. But many Christian men are blessed with submissive wives, yet they are afraid to push their wives to a greater level submission.
And that greater level of submission involves a wife’s total submission of her body to her husband. Some conservative Christian men might say “my wife is submitted to me; she gives me sex whenever I want it”. Brother if you are that man, then you are truly blessed. But listen to me husbands. Just because your wife gives you sex whenever you want it does not mean she has totally submitted her body to you.
Does she allow you do whatever you would like sexually with her body, aside from seriously harmful acts or immoral acts like threesomes with the neighbor? Does she let you control how she dresses?
Now some women might go along with their husband’s wanting them to dress more conservatively. But what if you asked your wife to reveal more of her body when you went out for dinner together? What if you asked her to wear a revealing dress or go without a bra? Would she buck you on those things? If you know she would, then your wife is not totally submitted her body your authority.
If you asked your wife to remove her clothes and let you take pictures of her naked or in erotic poses would she let you? If she would not then she has totally submitted her body to your authority. If you told your wife you were going to share her beauty in the form of some erotic pictures, she made for you with other men would she buck you on it? If she would, then she has not totally submitted her body to your authority.
Have you become complacent in helping to develop your wife’s submission to its fullest? If you have, I pray you will step outside your comfort zone and help your wife to step outside her comfort zone to take her to this next and perhaps greatest level of submission that a woman could attain toward her husband.
So how will having your wife make erotic images bless both your marriage and others as well?
First, it will bless your marriage by bringing your wife’s level of submission to you to a level few marriages ever reach. If your wife is so submitted to you, that she would fully accept you taking erotic and sexual pictures of her and then distributing those to other men this submission will translate into all other areas of your marriage.
Second, in doing this you will bless other men whose wives may not be as submissive and sexually available as your wife. Even for other men whose wives may be submissive and sexually available, you will give them something to help them exercise their polygynous nature through sexual fantasy.
And finally, there is another way that having your wife make erotic images can bless others. It makes a statement. It makes a statement that a woman’s body is indeed a marvelous art work of God made for man’s visual pleasure, one that God meant to be shown off, not one that he meant to be hidden and horded by husbands.
As I write this article, I know many men who privately share pictures of their wives in small groups. But my goal is that one day some Christian men will be brave enough to allow me to share nude photos of their wives here to make the statement I have just mentioned. Even if the faces of these wives are blurred, I still think this would be a powerful testimony.
And gentlemen, lets face it, there are plenty of creative ways to hide your wife’s face without ever having to use a blur tool on the photos. Notice the painting at the top of this post shows a nude woman laying on a bed with her face looking away. This is one way to hide your wife’s face. But if you want to completely hide it, poses like the one in the painting below are other ways you can do this.
If you would like your wife to understand these concepts and you want to help her come to an acceptance of making erotic images for you, I would suggest you have her read my article “How Making Erotic Images for Your Husband Can Bless Your Marriage and Others as Well”. I would also suggest that you as her husband read the article first, so you can guide her through the concepts as she reads it and it has a lot of information that is not contained in this article.
Safeguards that Husbands Need to Enforce
If you choose to begin having your wife make erotic images and if you choose to share these images with other men you must put the following safe guards in place to protect your wife.
No man should ever be able to talk in a sexual way to your wife except you. Guard her email and phone contact information. They don’t get to send her emails, text messages or have any other communication with your wife. They don’t get to send your wife requests as to poses or actions she should do. You and you alone are her director in this ministry. Certainly, you can take suggestions from other men, but you need to be careful with that not turning into something where you tell your wife who wants what. Every pose she does is FOR YOU and what you do with it is your discretion.
While there is no sin in your wife displaying her beauty, even publicly, there is sin if you ask her to flirt with other men. For instance, if you ask your wife to wear a sexy outfit to dinner and the waiter notices there is no sin. But if you ask her to flirt with him there is sin this. In flirting with him in this way, she is sexually relating to a man not her husband. You are the only man she may flirt with.
Your wife could wear a tiny bikini to the beach or other places and there is no sin in her wearing this very revealing clothing. But again, the sin comes when you encourage her or other men to flirt with her. Again, no man may flirt with your wife except you! Remember that.
You need to guard yourself as well. Remember this rule. Fantasizing is not sin, but flirting is if it is another man’s wife. So, if the wife you are receiving pictures of is one that you go to church with you need to be careful that your interactions with her are completely above board. In order to avoid flirting you should very much limit how much you talk with or interact with her in person.